This message is to the men out there who are in a marriage or a long-term, committed relationship who are not experiencing the results that they are wanting to experience in that relationship.
Here’s the deal, men; if you don’t get incredibly right within yourself – WITH yourself! – it’s never going to work itself out.
You may sit there and think that she’s to blame, she’s the problem, and that she’s the one who needs to change.
If you say to yourself, “If only she would change this or change that or do this differently or do that differently, then things would be okay,” that is flat-out bullshit!
At the end of the day, you have control over one thing and one thing, only, and that is you and your choices!
You choose what you do with what life hands you, and you choose what you draw into your life!
Focus On Your Own Shit!
So…the woman in your life – wife or not – is what she is. She’s doing whatever she’s doing and being whoever she is being. That’s her business and her business alone. It is not your business!
Your business is what’s going on inside of you.
So…step number one is take 100% responsibility. Quit blaming her for your problems. Quit acting like a victim, waiting for her to change, saying that if she would do certain things, then the relationship would be fine and then the problems would resolve themselves.
YOU take 100% responsibility and make the changes in you! YOU make the changes!
So…once you have taken 100% responsibility, there are some other things that you need to be aware of.
There Is Work To Do To Create The Results That You Want To Have In Your Relationship!
If you don’t know how to communicate effectively, your relationships are going to struggle. If you carry on with the same mindsets that were modeled to you by your parents, your community, and your surroundings, then you’re going to have the same results that they’ve had.
Those results are that, basically 60% of all marriages end in divorce, today. So, if you think you know how to relate, but you haven’t actually made the investments to learn the mindsets and skill sets necessary to successfully relate…good luck with that.
That’s like assuming that you’re a black belt in karate but you haven’t actually taken the time to invest to gain the skill sets, the knowledge, or the mindsets necessary to be a black belt.
You were not born a black belt. No one was born a black belt at karate or relationships, so take the time!
Make the investments.
Learn the skills.
Upgrade the “computer” that you have that’s operating in an inefficient way so that you can expand the mindset that you have in relation to relationships and have the results that you want to have!
It’s all up to you!
Quit blaming life.
Quit blaming God.
Quit blaming women.
Quit blaming your woman.
Quit blaming the surroundings outside of you.
Don’t even blame yourself! Give up the self abuse while you’re at it.
Just stop. Take 100% responsibility, love yourself fully, and from that place, you can love her fully.
As you start learning and relating in a new way, you will create a new result.
And that’s it for today.
Have an amazing day.